Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
we should paint friendship bongs
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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