i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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