Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
