So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
