i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She's the barista slut.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
