is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
