Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
