I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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