so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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