Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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