if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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