is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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