Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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