Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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