it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
