sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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