He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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