my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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