is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
