I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
