He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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