I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
