apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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