My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
