I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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