There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Randomize
