my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
