ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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