oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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