I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
even my farts smell like vagina
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
