Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
