I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
