i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
you win again, gameday.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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