just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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