it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
