Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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