Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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