jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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