Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
