his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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