watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
