She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
