I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
