Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
