I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Randomize
