Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Randomize
