You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
