I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
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