Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
