your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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