Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
